Miss you my amazing dad!

Miss you my amazing dad! I have so much in my hearts to say dad, but words fail me. I miss you everyday dad, wish you never left. Wish we could say daddy is coming back home, but you are never coming back dad, and that breaks my heart. I want you to know that you will forever be in my heart dad. Thanks for being there while you were here, thanks for caring for your kids, thanks for the lives you touched, thank for the smiles you brought to people's faces, thanks for the tears you took away while you were here dad. Love you dad. Till we meet again at the feet of Jesus.

MY DEEPEST THOTS

I never thought that someday I would write  about grief ,well I have lost some precious souls and I wish there is something I could do to bring them back close to me once again but I find out I am helpless in this situation ,olufunke my friend cant come back and my amazing father Olumide too is gone and there is nothing I can do about it ,no matter how much I feel like I can handle the hurts in my heart ,sometimes I just want to break down ,sometimes am angry, but no matter how angry I get it wont bring my loving souls back, nothing I do or say will bring them back.

Sometimes in the past I told God I could not handle the death of any of my parents, I begged God to keep them for me ,till their old age, but I get the opposite ,my dad is gone ,the man I look like, the man I talk like, the man I laugh and smile like is gone and am helpless about it, there is nothing I can do about it, Olumide Michael Olaleye ,this amazing man, sacrificial father is gone, the man who gave so much and instead got nothing in return at least not on this earth.

I have so many questions I want to ask God but who am I to ask the unquestionable God (Aseyitowu- the God that does as it pleases) this questions, who am I to ask this sovereign God that why would He test me with the exact thing I begged him not to test me with? Truly we are nothing but pencils in the hand of the creator because I knew it was going to break me, I knew I wasn’t strong enough, am not sure how people handle grief because sometimes my heart will physically hurt and it will seem like I can’t go on.

TRIBUTE TO MY LOVING DAD

4/03/2013

They say if you write about your grief, it heals faster. I have written a lot, just like you I love to express my  thought through writing, I remember, we found some of your amazing poems with your beautiful hand writing, beautifully written daddy. Beautifully written. If I could write to you and tell you how much I hurt daily, it won’t help much, you know why? Because I guess you know that already dad.

This life is pointless dad, because if I could wake up someday and someone like you would be gone, then what is the point of these struggles, it all seems pointless to me.

You know we have this horrible ache in our heart that we have tried so hard to keep and not make it so obvious, to say I miss you everyday is not just mere words, it is the only thing I can think about, now I sit at my table and I remember the day your calls came in and you told me Seyi Olaleye- I saw your name in the papers and when I told my friends they were surprised you saw my name because of the long list ,it just show your dedication to the success of your children .You loved us dad, and you proved that in a lot of ways.

The evil people came at some point and they tried all they could to turn you against us, but because you had a conscience you couldn’t ,although those were your low moments and I struggled to forgive you, all the same the love I have for you wont let me stay angry at you for long, you were a true rare gem, so that why your departure makes it almost impossible to breath sometimes, sometimes I imagine you alone on the other side, because we are your family, and you are no longer with us, but I pray that you are with Jesus now, because that is your real family, He is the one who truly loves you even more than we do, so I take great consolation in the fact that you are part of his angels now, doing far greater good than you did while on earth, I can only imagine how good you will feel singing with the angels.

So sing on daddy till we meet to part no more at the feet of Jesus our Lord. Love you forever